Nothing like the ‘C’ Word to Set Things Straight!


Did your Scooby Doo persona come alive too??

There’s a ‘C’ word that sets things striaight? Absolutely!!

I’m sure you realize by now that the ‘C’ word is NOT the 4-letter one that makes women’s blood boil but the 13-letter one that challenges you to stop taking the easy road: confrontation.

“Confront your neighbors directly, so you do not share in their guilt.” ~ Leviticus 19: 17

Confrontation was one of those things I steered clear from. I’d avoid it like the plague whenever possible. And when it wasn’t possible, I’d tip toe around the pink elephant in the room in hopes of keeping the peace. You know that old saying if it ain’t broke don’t fix it? Well, what I didn’t realize is that by adopting this “avoid it at all costs” mentality, I was actually helping to perpetuate the situation–helping to keep it alive. I was just as guilty–just as responsible–for the situation as the other person was.

When we see something that’s wrong and fail to–at the very least–voice our objections, we condone the very act that we despise. When we willfully allow others to use manipulative methods like guilt, self-pity or anger to control us, we’re doing more than “keeping the peace,” we’re sending the message it’s acceptable to mistreat, disrespect or use us at leisure. Now, I don’t know about you, but that’s NOT the message I want to send to anyone.

Confrontation is never easy. Having the courage to say “no more” or “I’m not going to let you treat me that way,” is a hard thing to do but the alternative is worse. Either we correct the problem or we condone it. The only person who can make the choice is you!

You don’t have to allow others to lord over you, bully you or pressure you into doing (or not doing) something. Whether they are controlling family members or unruly persons in authority over you, you have the right to confront the situation and refuse to allow others’ behaviors to continue to have power over you.

Thanks for visiting!


6 thoughts on “Nothing like the ‘C’ Word to Set Things Straight!

  1. The Classy Woman says:

    Another great post topic Selena. There are too many women that shy away from ‘confrontation’ and continue to deal with manipulative and controlling people in their lives.

    I once had a business partner who was non-confrontational and I am the take charge, non-nonsense gal so you can imagine who our clients perceived as the good guy and who was the bad guy. That never held me back though because you can never correct what you don’t confront. Thank you for sharing the scripture too. 🙂

    God called us to be ‘bold’. Below is one of my favorite scriptures.’

    ‘The wicked flee when no man pursues; but the righteous are bold as a lion’
    ~Proverbs 28:1

    Karla @


    • 1stepup says:

      You are so right: God has called us to be bold. And I’m glad you stuck to your guns. Too many times, we as women back down for fear of being the “bad guy” or seeming pushy.

      I’m so glad you enjoyed the post and thanks for leaving a comment!

      Have a wonderful day! =))


  2. Shannon says:

    Amen! This is a wonderful post. I am one of the few people that does confront – not because I like to – I hate to actually. But, I cannot stand by and let people attempt to manipulate me or guilt me into things and not call them on it. I also have to watch my own tendencies to manipulate. I always remember what Paul said in Galations:

    “Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
    Galatians 1:10

    That is how people have tried to get to me. By me wanting to please them, fit in, or whatever instead of thinking about pleasing God first. I have found that even though people get mad when I stand up for myself – and then try to guilt me for it, God doesn’t! When I stand against something and stand in who I am in Christ – God approves!

    I have really enjoyed reading your blog and your fashion segments on Blissfully Domestic. Thank you!


    • 1stepup says:


      High five to you!! I’m so glad you put it out there: confrontation is NOT easy nor is it ENJOYABLE! But it your RIGHT to do so to prevent others from manipulating you. Bravo!! And the scripture you quoted is so on the mark!! It’s either men or God, you can’t get much plainer than that.

      I’m delighted that you’ve enjoyed my blog as well as my writing for BD. I love having the opportunity to share both passions of mine without apology.

      Thanks for visiting and don’t be a stranger! =))


  3. jackie says:

    Hi i am one of those women who in my past allowed people to control me…but no more…thanks for the great topic and the inspiring words to help people like me take control of their own happiness. love your site.


    • 1stepup says:

      *Double high fives to you Jackie*

      That’s awesome!! Your defiance in letting others control you gives women every where hope because we know it IS possible!!

      I hope to see you around the site!! I’m more inspired than ever to share all that I’m learning on my journey to love myself and love others the way I’m meant too.

      Thanks so much for visiting and you’re no longer a stranger. =))


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